A couple of months ago, we went to the Golden Spike with my sister. She shared a documentary on trains that she watched recently. She told me that the tracks get loose over time and they have to go through the tracks and pile the rocks or dirt back on. If they do not, the train can bounce of the tracks!! This has stuck with me ever since and has helped me find the perfect analogy of marriage! Especially for Seth and I.
Everything Seth and I have done has been fast. There was no taking it slow. We met and got engaged two weeks later. In three months we were married. One month after we got married, we got pregnant. Before we hit our first anniversary, we were pregnant again. Before our 4th anniversary we welcomed our third child into the world. If you have a story faster than ours? I’d love to hear it.
What our story and the train have in common is the speed. Trains are fast and so was a our life together. With every obstacle that sped through our life, our tracks would get looser and looser. There were many times either one of us could have decided to walk away. But because through each obstacle we faced, each new adventure, we went back through our tracks and built up the rocks to secure our relationship.
Dr Van Epp created the RAM the Relationship Attachment Model. He talks about five areas in a relationship. Know, Trust, Rely, Commit, and Touch. So when walking down the tracks, Seth and I would look into each of these areas and make sure they were strong. If any of them were struggling we would tackle them. If it was know, we would sit and just talk about dreams, goals, and who we’ve become through our obstacles. It doesn’t matter what area is struggling, there is always a way to build it up. Think about your love languages and use that to help build them up.
I don’t care how fast or how slow you are in your marriage or relationship because in the end, what matters is how often do you go back to look at your relationship. It’s about the daily chats to keep the bond strong. It’s about the little things in your relationship that reminds you why you wanted to be with them in the first place. It’s about choosing every day to walk hand in hand down the tracks finding where you need to build up the rocks.
That’s why I love the train analogy because it can work for those who move fast like us or move slow like others. It can help people find answers on how to strengthen their marriage or to just keep it strong. It can show people what is important and what can wait. But this is my reason for loving this analogy, what reason do you love it?? or what analogy would best describe your marriage?